Bakura's Guide to the YGO world of Semes and Ukes
by Luel Eclipse Reinhardt
Summary: Title says all. Wanna know what and how to tell apart the different types of semes and ukes? Bakura teaches how with the aid of the YGO cast


All standard disclaimers apply. Thanks to Kappa san for her blog inspiration. 

**Bakura's Guide to the Yu Gi Oh World of Ukes and Semes **

**Prologue**

It was a falsely bright and cheery day, the type of day when something would, if it and mostly likely could, go wrong. The birds were chirping and singing brightly, the trees were swaying in the gentle breeze that tenderly guided pink cherry blossom petals through the… 

Anyway, today every POPULAR MALE in the anime series known as Yu-Gi-Oh was gathered in the now very cramped apartment of one white haired teen and his three thousand year old tomb robbing spirit. As expected, they were bored and had nothing to do, which resulted in them lazing around the house of Bakura. 

Everyone was pleasantly bored out of their minds and was more or less willing to do anything to break the air of ennui. It then came to be, that they ended up playing the game of 'Who wants to be a Sennen Heir* 'When young Mokuba Kaiba asked the question that made all in the vicinity pale.

Facing he was the elder Kaiba, the only one capable of 'hosting' such a game thanks to his vast intelligence. He had placed a question before his adored younger brother, a simple one and yet, he was stumped, the question returned however…the question put before him by his beloved younger sibling, simply stunned his brother, for all his wisdom as high priest, not even he knew the answer to the question.

Turning his large, pleading, innocent gray eyes at his brother, the younger Kaiba brother asked…

"Nii-sama, what's an Uke?" 

Faced with stunned looks, the younger Kaiba went on to inquire…

"What's a Seme?" 

Jaws hanging open in flabbergasted shock, the elder Kaiba looked at his darling little brother in astonishment as he floundered for the answer. 

"I…it…erm…"

Multitudes of eyes turned to stare at the elder Kaiba. Here was the question that humanity had been asking for eons. What EXACTLY was an Uke and/or Seme and HOW were they CLASSIFIED? Not even those at Area 51 could fathom the alien answer to the extraterrestrial question. Did the divine High Priest know the answer?

His head dropping in defeat, the elder Kaiba shook his head in the negative.

"I…I…I don't know…" 

Everyone gasped, the High Priest didn't know…then…then who did? The Pharaoh perhaps? They turned to look at him, the question in their eyes. However, the Pharaoh did but disappoint by looking away in regret. Even the Godling did not know…then who knew? Someone had to have the answer. But if both the High Priest and the Pharaoh did not know then…

"BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!" 

Loud, thunderous laughter filled the ears of those present. They looked about in wonder, was it a god come to visit, to relieve them of this enigma? 

No. No, it was not. It was merely a white haired Tomb Robber. 

"I know the answer!" shouted the Tomb Robber as everyone looked at him in surprise. How did he come about such knowledge? 

"Impossible!" shouted the nameless Pharaoh, believing strongly that it was but a hoax, what could a lowly Tomb Raider know about something this profound? It had to be a lie. But what if…What if it were true? And the Tomb Robber DID know something. 

All present stared in disbelief as the Tomb Robber smiled proudly at them. At last, he knew of something that they didn't. The joy of having greater knowledge! 

He caught the disbelieving stares of those around him and made heist to ensure them of the reliability of his knowledge.

"Wait, here me out," begged the Tomb Robber, "Here what I have to say before ye doubt my knowledge."

Those around looked at each other with uncertainty. Could his words be trusted? Then, the Pharaoh spoke, deciding for all, the path they would take.

"Speak freely Tomb Robber, however," warned the Pharaoh, "however, should your words seem false, familiar, the Shadow Realm shall be to you." 

The Tomb Robber nodded and began his session, eager to impress those who were listening.

**Should we go on?? Review and we shall thread on…**


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